#73: Oh, What Hard Luck Stories They All Hand Me (S5 E18)

Mike Montgomery leaves a bag of candy on a pier for a ghost. The ghost of a ghost shows up to pick up a book about ghosts. It has a ghost tape in it. Emily whispers into a ghost about empanadas and Talia eats that shit up.

#72: Bin of Sin (S5 E17)

Hanna is all agitated because maybe the cops will think she dissolved her bestie's dead body in a barrel. Ashley Marin contemplates life's hard choices with her best friend, pinot grigio. Emily saves the day. Again.

#71: Over A Barrel (S5 E16)

Caleb heads back to his ancestral home in the air ducts. Emily wears a shirt, but no pants. Spencer's new house elf needs an egg. Egg. EGG!!

#70: Fresh Meat (S5 E15)

So many messes this week - Emily throws food against a wall, Hanna gets guts on her shoes, Caleb sweats through a freshly laundered tee. And of course, Mama Marin gets her sheets dirty with Jason Dilaurentis. 

#69: Through A Glass, Darkly (S5 E14)

Mona is DEAD (ish?). Paige is LEAVING (for now?). Mike is CRYING (because he almost stapled his sister to coffee house wall?). Thank god we have each other to process it with.

#68: How the A Stole Christmas (S5 E13)

Much like Ali, we have risen from the grave to once again make your lives A-fucking-mazing. Also, oh my god the Liars had a Christmas orgy.

#67: Scream for Me (S5 E8)

Lips McGee says "aahhh" and shows Emily the Olympic sized swimming pool inside her trouty mouth. The systematic victimization of teenage girls continues to be Rosewood's main cultural export and someone finally takes umbrage. A horse tries to get Spencer's number.

#66: The Silence of E. Lamb (S5 E7)

We love y...  Uh. Um. We'd love to recap this episode for you. <insert GOD DAMMIT EMILY! FACE>

#65: Escape from New York (S5 E1)

Ali is back and we are warming up to the idea. The girls are trying to escape from New York, and Ryan is like, bitches I did that shit months ago.