ALOTO: Batter Up

 The pod is back and Rose and Ryan are hyped to discuss A League of Their Own S1E1. It's tryouts, it's Max being amazing but not allowed to try out, it's the joy of friendship, athleticism, and Greta Gill's distracting midriff. What do you do when someone puts their fingers in your drink? How does flirting work? Where do you know Kate Berlant from? How many baseball puns are too many? Jump on this already moving train and find out. 

Riverdale - Chapter 14 - A Kiss Before Dying

Season 2 is here! Daddy's home, Cheryl's slightly singed, and the Pussycats are giving us life (1 of 9, to be exact). Welcome back to nostalgic murder town!

Riverdale - Chapter 13 - The Sweet Hereafter

It's the Season 1 finale! All the OTPs are in effect - Archie and Veronica! Betty and Jughead! Cheryl and an icy river!

Riverdale - Chapter 9 - La Grande Illusion

Cheryl taps a maple tree, Archie becomes a paid escort, there's a lot of businesstalk and Rose and Ryan grapple with how the hell anyone can talk about Glee. 

Riverdale - Chapter 5 - Heart of Darkness

Riverdale buries Jason Blossom and every one (except Veronica, maybe) is a total creep about it. Ryan engineers a controversial Mr. T moment. And Rose learned to manage her compressor settings and bring you a smoother sound mix, you're welcome.

Come say hi on twitter, @prettyrecaps

Riverdale - Chapter 4 - The Last Picture Show

Oh no! The drive-in is closing. Where will Betty get her James Dean fix? Where will Veronica get nachos? Where will Jughead sleep?

Riverdale - Chapter 1 - The River's Edge

Same channel, new murder suspects! The siren song of teen noir has drawn us back in. We're recapping Riverdale, starting with a few eps from Season 1 to get up primed up for the Season 2 premier.

#74: Tick Tock, Bitches (S7 E1)

In the parlance of PLL - We're Back, Bitches. 

#73: Oh, What Hard Luck Stories They All Hand Me (S5 E18)

Mike Montgomery leaves a bag of candy on a pier for a ghost. The ghost of a ghost shows up to pick up a book about ghosts. It has a ghost tape in it. Emily whispers into a ghost about empanadas and Talia eats that shit up.

#72: Bin of Sin (S5 E17)

Hanna is all agitated because maybe the cops will think she dissolved her bestie's dead body in a barrel. Ashley Marin contemplates life's hard choices with her best friend, pinot grigio. Emily saves the day. Again.

#71: Over A Barrel (S5 E16)

Caleb heads back to his ancestral home in the air ducts. Emily wears a shirt, but no pants. Spencer's new house elf needs an egg. Egg. EGG!!

#70: Fresh Meat (S5 E15)

So many messes this week - Emily throws food against a wall, Hanna gets guts on her shoes, Caleb sweats through a freshly laundered tee. And of course, Mama Marin gets her sheets dirty with Jason Dilaurentis. 

#69: Through A Glass, Darkly (S5 E14)

Mona is DEAD (ish?). Paige is LEAVING (for now?). Mike is CRYING (because he almost stapled his sister to coffee house wall?). Thank god we have each other to process it with.

#68: How the A Stole Christmas (S5 E13)

Much like Ali, we have risen from the grave to once again make your lives A-fucking-mazing. Also, oh my god the Liars had a Christmas orgy.

#67: Scream for Me (S5 E8)

Lips McGee says "aahhh" and shows Emily the Olympic sized swimming pool inside her trouty mouth. The systematic victimization of teenage girls continues to be Rosewood's main cultural export and someone finally takes umbrage. A horse tries to get Spencer's number.

#66: The Silence of E. Lamb (S5 E7)

We love y...  Uh. Um. We'd love to recap this episode for you. <insert GOD DAMMIT EMILY! FACE>

#65: Escape from New York (S5 E1)

Ali is back and we are warming up to the idea. The girls are trying to escape from New York, and Ryan is like, bitches I did that shit months ago.

#64: Wild Things

If you like inappropriate teacher student relationships and murder (and we know you do PLL fans) then have we got a film for you!

#63: A is for Answers (S4 E24)

A is allegedly for answers. But maybe it's more like for Ah, what the hell Ali how many people did you see in one night? and AHmyGOD Melissa how fucking creepy can you be? And Ahhhmily, every time you almost die your hair looks A-mazing.

#62: She's Come Undone (S4 E21)

Take a trip in the not-so-way back machine to when Aria had a breakdown and trashed some vintage-y looking shit at Ezra's house. Also, Rose has some heartfelt relationship advice for Paige and Emily.

#61: Unbridled (S4 E 23)

All you need to know is that everyone is in wedding dresses and Ashley Marin and Jessica DiLautentis are exploring dom/sub roleplay. Oh, and Spencer gets fingerboned.

(Ryan left you a surprise at the end!)

#60: Cover for Me (S4 E22)

Aria sucks face with some Elvish dude who named his guitar (or did it name itself?). Spencer is convinced that she killed Ali… even though Ali is alive, REMEMBER SPENCE? And a gold star goes to Mama DiLaurentis. She got breaking & entering skills we didn’t even KNOW about!  

#59 Free Fall (S4 E20)

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANYMORE!! Aria learns the truth about Ezra the Scumbag. Rose and Ryan discuss the shit out of it, simple as that.

#58: Shadow Play (S4 E19)

Spencer can keep popping those pills if it gives us this kind of fun ride every week. Nothing will get accomplished but Ali standing in front of a portrait of herself is entertaining enough to watch for another two seasons at least.

#57: Hot for Teacher (S4 E18)

Hanna is our new favorite sleuth, Spencer is our new favorite junky, Emily is our new favorite lasagna boxer and Aria is our new favorite Katniss Everdeen. And we answer your questions!

#56: Bite Your Tongue (S4 E17)

It’ss time for some exploratory dental work! Mona makes her triumphant return this week… and lands on Mike Montgomery’s lips. I know! We thought he was gay, too! Spencer decided drugs are the answers, while Hanna turns to mystery novels. Emily finalls reaches a breaking point, so ACT NORMAL, BITCH! We break it down so that you don’t have to.

#55: Close Encounters (S4 E16)

Emily tries on a lot of jackets and it makes us SO SAD.

#49: I Must Confess (S2 E11)

Throwback episode! It's 3-2-1 CONTACT as your friendly neighborhood podcasters Rose & Ryan kick it old school with season 2's "I Must Confess." You probably didn't remember a sexy scene with Emily and Mama Marin did you!? WELL WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT (over a box of wine).

#54: The Love Shack (S4 E15)

Our first ever remote podcast. Ryan is cuddled up with a bottle of Capitain Morgan's in New Hampshire and Rose is on the mean streets of NYC. But distance can not stop us from talking about Emily's complicated Ali feelings, Spencer's ridiculous caplet thing and Hanna and...MIKE?

#53: Who's in the Box (S4 E14)

This week, we ask: Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated? Acting like you're somebody else('s body in my friend's crypt)getting me frustrated?

#52 Touched by an Angel (S2 E10)

After a long holiday hiatus, we are back and (pretty little) lying more than ever! We bid farewell to Wifey Caleb as he moves off to Ravenswood, discuss why a Halloween podcast was skipped (for now), and discuss important things like Punky Brewster and Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? OH! And we recap of 2nd season's "Touched by an Angel." Do YOU remember what the girls were wearing?

Tweet us @prettyrecaps!

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#51: Person of Interest (S1 E19)

It's a commentary track episode! Since we're upset about the departure of Wifey Caleb, we harken back to a happier time - the Very Special Episode when Caleb and Hanna go...ahem. Camping. And Toby takes his shirt off for the first time. And Paige and Emily go to an ambiguously gay karaoke lodge? Smoochies for all! (Except Ezra. None for you Ezra).

#50: Picture This (S2 E9)

Jen makes her triumphant return to the podcast… just in time for lesbian poker night! We jump in the way way back machine to Season 2, Episode 9…’cause Rose has been waiting to talk shit about Samara FOREVER. Ryan is just confused there’s some chick named Bianca in this one. Oh, and Jason has a creepy photo stalk room of Aria… #notsexy. Tweet us @prettyrecaps

#48: Reality Bites Me (S1 E5)

Harken back to Season 1 as Ryan and Rose provide the commentary track to Reality Bites Me” from Season1. Remember when Hanna works at the dentist office? Or when Emily befriends Toby… despite his bad haircut? Or Ella hates on Byron and we all LOVED it? Now you can! Follow us on twitter - @prettyrecaps.

#47: Now You See Me, Now You Don’t (S4 E12)

The long anticipated midseason finale podcast is HERE! Ryan returns to talk about the revelAtion at the end of this episode, as he and Rose debate whether or not Alison is really alive. Although a psychic old lady tries to ruin, there’s two redcoats now… that that means something for everyone!

Agree with any of our theories? Tweet us! @prettyrecaps

#46: Bringing Down the Hoe (S4 E11)

Ryan couldn’t make it to the studio this week. So we took this opportunity to give CeCe a chance at the co-host chair! Rose and CeCe catch up on her reappearence, pre-season finale mysteries, and those country western outfits! All this, and Emily wields a farm weapon. HEY GUYS - we missed you!

#45: Hot Water (S3 E20) FORMERLY LOST NOW FOUND

Can this be real???! The LOST EPISODE (2013) finally surfaces!

In this extra long episode (honestly, it’s really not that much longer than usual), Ryan and Rose (and Jen!) are welcome by the multi-talented Dana Piccoli, the AfterEllen columnist and YouTube sensation who wrote, produced, and performed “The Ballad of Rosewood”. But you already knew that, because you are already obsessed with Dana, like we are. We specifically discuss the episode “Hot Water” including A theories (it’s probably Melissa), Spencer’s insanely large shower, and (as always) Paige and Emily’s relationship. Wifey Caleb and CeeCee drop by, too!

#44: Turn of the Shoe (S4 E2)

Emily Injury! Creepy Birds! Aria Making Out with Strangers! It’s a crazy week as we get into the Liars’ new season. We still have time to talk about our vacation plans… which is why the podcast was so delayed. But it’s finally here for you to enjoy… probably just as much as Paige had a lady boner for the most unrealistic college dorm of all time!

#43: A is for A-L-I-V-E (S4 E1)

We are just thrilled to be back in Rosewood, land of beautiful teenage lesbians and SWEET jackets. Dive back into the adrenalized hyperreality with us!

#42: The Badass Seed (S1 E18)

Remember when we said we should be the DVD commentary for PLL? Well now, we ARE. Queue up your DVRs, your Netflix, or your iTunes download of “The Bad Ass Seed” (Episode 18 of Season 1) and listen to our trenchant critiques of the episode as you watch.

Tweet us @prettyrecaps if you like our new experimental format!

#41: Je Suis Une Amie (S1 E16)

We’re BACK with a classic episode from Season 1. Caleb’s haunting the air ducts, Toby has helmet hair and Paige and Emily are getting all kinds of wet together. It’s the good ol’ days! 

#40: A Dangerous Game (S3 E24)

Spencer is EVIL… or is she? Toby is DEAD… or is he? Jenna is a LESBIAN… oh, well… guess that is true now. We take on the latest PLL finale, including intensive debate on how to pronounce “Shana.” 

PLL is going on hiatus, but look for more podcasts over the break as we recap Season 1 and 2 episodes.

#39: I'm Your Puppet (S3 E23)

We just go off on Aria for misplacing a child.

#38: Will the Circle Be Unbroken? (S3 E22)

Man, Spencer is crazy. OR IS SHE? 

Gotta cut this short, I’m setting up drinks with Ashley Marin in NYC. See you soon, Ash!

#37: Out of Sight, Out of Mind (S3 E21)

It’s all about the baby hate this week as Ryan and Rose take turns getting aggresisve with Ezra’s squirt. But! the episode is saved by a mother/daughter cop killer pact. Thanks Mama Marin. Also, Emily, stop going everywhere alone!!!!!!! Oh. And Toby died (no, he didn’t).

#36: What Becomes of the Broken-Hearted (S3 E19)

Whew…the episode was weirdly sexy. Andrew’s pecs and Spencer’s bra and Emily’s cupcakes and Cece running out to pleasure herself in the car because she’s overcome by Wesria fumes… The leaping, the choking, the sexy church pews! it’s getting hot in hurrrrrrr. 

#35: Dead to Me (S3 E18)

Ryan has a lot to say about Hanna’s Barnyard Realness look. Rose is like eh on Uncle Daddy. Absolutely no one thinks Emily killed anyone. Spencer’s nuts, whatevs. And special guest dog Bailey!

#34: Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire (S3 E17)

Hanna goes to a lesbian bar! Hanna goes to a lesbian bar! Hanna goes to a lesbian bar! Did anything else happen? I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear the question, it’s just too loud here in this Hanna filled lesbian bar. 

#33: Misery Loves Company (S3 E16)

OMG. This one is hilarious. And Toby is evil. The end.

#32: Mona Mania (S3 E15)

Things get so HOT in Rosewood that the studio almost burns down with Ryan, Rose and Jen in it! Between Mona mania, Montgomery mayhem, Hanna’s breaking point and Paige’s break down, it’s enough to make you too dizzy for peak performance in the academic decathlon.

#31: She's Better Now (S3 E14)

Mona’s back! Doing really normal things like carrying brains in the school hallways and breathing on Hanna in her sleep. Ryan and Rose agree, she’s TOTALLY better now. (or not at all, still totally crazy, RUN HANNA RUN!).

#30: If At First You Don't Succeed, Lie, Lie Again (S1 E15)

This week we take a look back at the birth of Paige McCullers. Those bangs! That ambition! The way she resentfully fondled Emily’s bra! SWOON. 

Also, something about a kill switch. Kill switch. KILL SWITCH. Wait, Ella, what’s a kill switch?

#29: This is a Dark Ride (S3 E13)

There’s was so much to celebrate this Halloween. Paige is Batman! And Emily is a sex alien! AND it’s our podcast anniversary!

#28: The Perfect Storm (S1 E9)

Just in time for our real life Hurricane Sandy, we hole up in the library with the Pretty Little Liars to wait out the storm. Harken back to a time when Lucas was cute, when Wifey Caleb was living in the air ducts [does not appear] and no one knew that Emily liked ladies. THUNDERCRACKLE.

#27: That Girl is Poison (S3 E5)

It’s finally time to get Nate out of the way this week as we take a trip in the way back machine to recap the episode that aired while Rose was was away last summer. And finger lickin’ good it is! If Paige’s sticky fingers aren’t enough for you, we also discuss the soda tax, give you a really sad story about chocolate covered espresso beans, and pitch a new animated series – Ezra: the Squirrel.

#26: Priviledged (BONUS 2)

BONUS EPISODE! While PLL is on hiatus, Ryan gets to live his dream of making Rose watch the Pilot for “Privileged”, featuring Lucy Hale. Spoiler alert: Rose remains lukewarm. Featured guest star Jen is back this week, too! Remember to send in your requests for hiatus episodes before Halloween!

#25: The Lady Killer (S3 E12)

Who killed Maya? It’s hard to see whodunnit (except we TOTALLY did) ’cause you’ve probably been blinded by Aria’s skirt this episode. Ryan gets inappropriate about Toby’s manhood, but Rose is too busy being obsessed with Paily braiding each other’s hair to notice. All that AND Ezra sniffs a bunt cake!

#24: Single Fright Female (S3 E11)

Ryan and Rose have a LOT to say about Paige and Emily. Cece, Wifey Caleb, the Mona Monster…everyone’s at the pArty in this episode!

#23: What Lies Beneath (S3 E10)

Ryan and Rose are kind of bummed out, because there aren’t a lot of good things to say when it comes to The Nate Thing. Thank God for Aria’s face. And their special guest star(s)! But Ella, honey, close your legs. 

#22: The Kahn Game (S3 E9)

Wifey Caleb is back in full force this week, and just in time to smooch Hanna into submission. Aria meets Ezra’s little gay brother, which takes away from what we really wanted to see: namely, more Emily and Paige. Who’s your betrAyal suspect? We test our theories in this week’s amazing episode!

#20: Stolen Kisses (S3 E8)

It’s all about Paige and Emily this week, and Rose is convinced the pool means something sexual. Ryan is too busy worshipping his new Queen – Ezra’s mom – to notice. And Wifey Caleb is back from California, and he’s looking for laundry tips! It’s an extra long episode this time ’round, ’cause we didn’t give a brown rat’s ass about making it short! Enjoy!

#19: Crazy (S3 E7)

Ryan and Rose take the train to crazytown in this episode. And unsurprisingly, there are creepy dolls there. Also, we hate Nate. And Ella Montgomery? She Likes Unusual Tablecloths.

#18: Remains of the A (S3 E6)

It’s SPANNA Galore this week as Spencer and Hanna play Nancy Drew together in a hospital. Also in this episode: Mama Marin’s new man, the Epic Return of WEIRD FACE, and how creepy are those pre-teen girl videos anyway? We know you missed us! Brought to you by your favorite pretty big liars, Rose andRyan! We may podcast together, but we want our own cheese fries!

#17: Kingdom of the Blind (S3 E3)

It’s rants galore this week as Ryan attempts to take Rose off topic. Mona gets chatty in the loony bin and we have lots more fun with The Last Dynasty of Rosewood, especially now that Melissa is back. Also, what do you call the pairing of Emily and Aria? Too many vowels!

Tweet us @PrettyRecaps.

#16: Blood is the New Black (S3 E2)

In an oddly bloodless episode, Hanna Marin continues her campaign to be our new favorite by visiting Mona even as this kicks up marital problems with her wife, Caleb. Aria’s dad shows up (ugh!) and so does his old hussy (ugh!!!). At least Emily was sober this week!

#15: It Happened That Night (S3 E1)

After over two months of waiting, the Liars are back… and so are Rose and Ryan! We delve into what our favorite ladies are doing, learn that Mama Marin is officially “open for business,” and (as usual) long for the return of Paige McCullers!

#14: Unspoken (Bonus Episode)

While PLL is on hiatus, Rose and Ryan recap an early work from Troian Bellisario’s (aka Spencer Hastings) filmography – the short film Unspoken. Hope you’re in the mood for lots of teen lesbians and face glitter!

#13: unmAsked (S2 E24)

Our pretty BIG recap on who ‘A’ is! Listen to us take 17 minutes of recovery time after the revelation! Learn who the toffee creeps are! Ryan promises to give a disturbingly funny prediction about Melissa’s evil baby! And of course, a discussion on why Paige is better than Maya.

#12: If These Dolls Could Talk (S2 E24)

Statutory Realness! Rose and Ryan debate the finer points of Ezra & Aria’s relationship!

#11: Eye of the Beholder (S2 E23)

Look. Up in the sky. It’s a bird. It’s a plane. It’s…Aria and some weird face dude?

#10: Father Knows Best (S2 E22)

Father Knows Best. So when he’s trying to cover up the fact that your sister murdered someone, just hush up and stop rifling through his drawers, Spencer. 

#9: Breaking the Code (S2 E21)

Oh Paige McCullers! How we’ve missed you!

#8: CTRL A (S2 E20)

The one where Rose does a spit take. 

#7: The Naked Truth/The Lost Episode (S2 E19)

The Lost Episode resurfaces in honor of Paige McCullers! It’s Truthiness Day at Rosewood High.

#6: A Kiss Before Lying (S2 E18)

Emily and Maya sittin’ in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

#5: The Blonde Leading the Blind (S2 E17)

Rose and Ryan wonder why teen girls are so awesome at being creeps.

#4: Let the Water Hold Me Down (S2 E16)

A (mostly) unedited, sugar-in-the-raw, dog-bark-less version of our chat. It’s so good, it’s CHEFboyARDEE!

#3: A Hot Piece of A (S2 E15)

Ryan and Rose discuss “A Hot Piece of A”.

That sounds a lot dirtier than it really is.

Podcast comments? Email prettylittlerecaps@gmail.com. Or tweet us @pretty recaps.

#2: Through Many Dangers, Toils and Snares (S2 E14)

Ryan and Rose are back, recapping the Pretty Little Liars midseason premiere. More hijinks and sleuthing and hats! And Emily Fields!

#1: The Pretty Little Halloween Episode (S2 E13)

Ryan and Rose recap the Pretty Little Liars Halloween Special and reveal eerie secrets from their own high school days regarding cappuccino addictions and Emily Fields type lady feelings.

Spoiler Alert: Spoilers for all seasons of PLL ahead.